No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We had sex on a dog bed..
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
