In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
