It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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