i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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