I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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