twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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