on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
