***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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