I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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