Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
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