Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
