I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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