He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
