i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Randomize
