yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
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