We're like a lot better than the average bears
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize