Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
People with herpes should wear stickers.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
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