we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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