so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
