who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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