i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
