Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
