Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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