thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Randomize