So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
