A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
