Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
