love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
