yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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