I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
The uberlube is also flammable
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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