garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
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