She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
