I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize