Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
