her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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