Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize