can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize