Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
