i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
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