i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
