I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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