Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
