O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
