Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize
