You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
