Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
My balls are so social today.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
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