Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize