nut hugger
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
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