it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
