He is an equal opportunity slut.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
