Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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